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14 November 2007 @ 10:08 am
Reunion (Part Two - End!)  
Title: Reunion, Part Two of Two
Fandom: Hot Fuzz
Character/s: NA/DB
Word Count: 5,200 (in two parts; part one, 2,000)
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Nicholas knows what he needs, and Danny is just the man to give it to him. Heh.

Background:
(Latest chapter in the Ring Cycle)
Part One


Reunion, Part Two


Later that night as they got ready for bed, Danny told Nicholas to sit down on the bed, and then sat down facing him.

“What you said earlier, ‘bout making you pay.”

Nicholas looked down, blushing and ashamed.

“I don’t like that.”

Nicholas did not answer, but was obviously trying to collect his thoughts, so Danny waited. “It…it is just how I feel about it.”

“Then we ain’t doin’ it again.”

Nicholas head snapped up. “What?”

“You heard me. Now go to bed.” Danny got up, angry. It was not the answer he wanted to hear and it was not the decision he wanted to make, but it was what felt right. He was not going to allow Nicholas to turn their love making into some kind of punishment. The two did not go together.

“Danny…” Nicholas sounded crushed.

“Go to bed, Nicholas. I’m going to watch a movie. You. Stay. Here.” Danny walked out and turned off the light, leaving Nicholas in the dark.

Over an hour later, Nicholas walked out. He was in his sweats and he was completely awake. Danny frowned at him, but he stood in the middle of the living room, looking around, looking lost. Finally Danny grabbed a back cushion off the couch and put it between his feet.

“You gonna stay up then you gotta sit here.” He pointed at the cushion. Nicholas glared at it for only a second before walking over and collapsing on the floor between Danny’s knees. It was where Andy sat once, only once, and it was then, with Andy, that Danny began to understand how he needed to deal with Nicholas, and how he wanted Nicholas too. Now that Nicholas was there, resting against him, Danny felt complete. He reached out and petted his head, running his fingers over Nicholas’ short crop of hair and down his neck.

When the movie was over, and for the life of him Danny could barely remember what he was watching, Nicholas looked up. “I need it, Danny. And if you can’t, or won’t, then things are not going to work.”

“Need what, Nicholas? To be punished? Or my love for you?”

Nicholas nodded. “Yes.”

Danny snorted and looked at the ceiling. “I love you, Nick. I’m not going to feel right if every time I make love to you, you think it’s some kind of punishment. That don’t even sound right to say.”

Nicholas pressed his forehead into Danny’s leg, and Danny saw a bit down his tee shirt, where the bruises of Andrew’s belt whipping were fading. Danny ran his hand over Nicholas’ back.

“I saw what Andrew did to you and it made me so mad that he hurt you, I almost got in a fight with ‘im. How could I do the same thing to you? It doesn’t feel right to hurt you. And I don’t want you to enjoy me hurting you. None of that is right.”

Nicholas looked up and rested his chin on Danny’s knee, gazing off to the side.

“That’s what Andrew was for...he…enjoys hurting you!” Danny thought it as he said it, and he was horrified.

Nicholas shook his head. “No. He enjoyed not worrying about hurting me, no matter what I asked for.”

Danny sat back, stunned. It was not at all what he thought, but now it made perfect sense. Nicholas needed structure, and rules, and a guiding hand in all the personal stuff, but just as much, he needed someone he could trust who also trusted him. An equal.

And that equal was not Danny.

He got up and walked straight into the kitchen, and leaned against the counter, closing his eyes. He could not be that to Nicholas, and he did not know what to do.

He heard Nicholas walk up behind him, and leaned against the counter, next to him.

“I’m sorry, Nicholas. I’ll never want to hurt you. It will never feel right.”

“That’s because we’re partners.”

Danny looked up, and he saw Nicholas totally put together, in control, and thinking very carefully about what he was going to say. Danny just watched, because sometimes, Nicholas was a beautiful thing to watch.

“Partners care for each other, Danny, and don’t hurt each other. I understand that, and honestly I don’t really want to get hurt by you. But I’ve learned that I can’t get to that point, that total emotional release, without being beaten into it. Don’t think I’m proud to say that. I’m not.”

Danny flinched to hear it put so clinically.

“I won’t beg for it, if that is what upsets you. You told me that our love making cannot be about punishment, and it won’t. I promise. But sometimes, Danny…I will ask.”

Danny shook his head.

“Danny, I’ll say this once, and I will never say it again. But if you cannot do it when I ask, when I need it, I will go to Andrew. He will do it, and then he will fuck me, because that’s his price. And I will love him for it.”

Nicholas shoved off the counter and went to bed.

Danny stood in the kitchen for a long time, trying not to cry, trying not to think, just trying to understand, but he could not. When he finally made it to the bed room, in some kind of composure, he found the light on and Nicholas awake, laying in bed, watching him. He sat down to take off his socks and Nicholas rolled over to him, and helped him get undressed. Then Nicholas went and sat back down on his side of the bed.

Danny knew he was thinking too much, but for the first time, he was scared to stop thinking. He began to understand what frightened Nicholas so much about it: losing control was not a comfortable place to go to, voluntarily. He closed his eyes and tried to shut down, to just breathe and know whatever it was he was supposed to know. The image popped into his head of Andrew and Nicholas together; he paired that with remembering Nicholas on Andy, so long ago, or Nicholas with Liz before that. Never at any point was Danny jealous of that. He simply could not be, because he always knew at those times that Nicholas was his. He was only ever jealous that Nicholas was doing those things, going off with other people…without Danny, and without Danny’s blessing, and for trying to live a part of his life without Danny at all.

It was the thought that put it all together for Danny. At work, there were rules, and Nicholas was the guardian of those rules, and he was the boss, and what he said, Danny would do. Anything, even if it meant busting the rule book all to hell, because the only rules that mattered were Nicholas’. It did not matter who else could or might give Danny orders, or what else Danny had to do on his job: Nicholas was his boss, and his partner, and Danny would follow him into hell if necessary. But at home, between them, it was really the reverse, and that meant that exactly the same to Nicholas, here, as it did to Danny at work. So it did not matter who else Nicholas did or what he did with them, because here they were partners but they were not equals. Yes, sometimes Nicholas needed an equal, but he always, always needed Danny. Finally Danny understood that he did not have to be everything to Nicholas, he just had to be himself.

Danny got up and marched around the bed, threw the sheets off of Nicholas, grabbed one arm and dragged him off. Nicholas stumbled to the floor and tried to stand up but Danny shoved him down and Nicholas ended up on his knees. Then Danny stepped back and crossed his arms. They were both naked and it did feel a bit silly but he had to say this to Nicholas in a way that Nicholas would never, ever forget.

“You will never, ever do anything like that unless I let you. You have to ask, and I have to say yes. If you don’t ask, or if I say no, then you can’t do it. I don’t care how much you think you need it, you can’t. That is the new rule. MY rule. And you can’t ever break it.”

“Danny, if I need…”

Danny sucked in a breath, steeling himself, then backhanded Nicholas into the nightstand. He tried not to follow him down, to coddle him or ask if he was hurt. Danny knew he was hurt, because he had not held back much, just enough to know that he did not break his jaw. People laughed at him sometimes, and he knew he was not graceful, but Danny was completely aware of how strong he was and what he could do.

Nicholas rolled onto his ass, holding his face in shock, staring at Danny.

“I love you. Don’t make me do that again.” Danny said it, crossing his arms, and trying not to cry. He hated this.

Nicholas nodded.

“Good. Because I don’t ever want to do that again. That’s not me, Nicholas. I can keep us together, I can set our rules, but I won’t go around hurtin’ you, even if you beg. If you need that and you need Andrew, I can accept that, but you have to ask, and I have to say yes. It’s about trust now, yeah? If you cannot agree to my new rule, then I can’t trust you, and we’re back where we were before.”

Nicholas look astounded by the logic of that, and simply nodded again.

“Er, we can go to bed now.” Danny said awkwardly and went back around to his side of the bed. As he got under the sheets, he looked up at Nicholas, who was standing by the bed, rubbing his face. “You okay, then?”

“Yes, Danny. Just hurting.”

Danny fiddled with the sheets. “Sorry. I just had to make you understand.”

“You did.”

“You goin’ to be alright? Did I break anythin’?” Danny looked carefully at his face as if he could see a broken tooth through Nicholas’ hand.

Nicholas actually smiled. “No, you didn’t. I think you fixed something.” Nicholas crawled over the sheets and wrapped his arms around Danny, kissing him, softly and gently and lovingly, as he straddled his lap. Danny finally felt his stomach unknot and wrapped his arms around Nicholas waist. They kissed for a very long time, long after they were turned on and horny and hard, keeping at each other’s mouths in loving passion.

“Nicholas?”

“Yes?” Nicholas pulled back and looked down at him. They were both flushed and breathing heavily, and broken out into a light sweat.

“I really missed you.”

Nicholas rested his head on Danny’s shoulder. “I’m sorry I’m such a twat.”

Danny laughed and hugged him. Then he ran a hand around and up Nicholas’ chest, and down between his legs, lightly holding his erection. Nicholas gasped and reared up a little. “Eh, I want to get you off,” Danny said simply as he kissed Nicholas’ chest.

“But…?”

“I want to make you happy.”

“You do. Always.”

“Yeah, but…ummm…” Danny kept kissing his chest. “I don’t think I know what makes you happy anymore.” Danny rested his head against Nicholas, looking off, wondering what he should do, even as he kept lightly stroking Nicholas’ erection.

Nicholas sighed, and for once, Danny was glad that he was thinking, because he needed Nicholas to think about this.

“Let’s try it again. No punishment. No anger. Just us.”

Danny gently pushed Nicholas backwards and once again pushed his legs apart as he settled himself between them, and once again, Nicholas was propped up on his elbows, but this time Danny leaned forward and Nicholas reached up and they kissed as Danny entered him, never letting go of Nicholas’ cock, stroking and then pumping him as his own thrusts picked up speed and power. Nicholas lost his breath at the start of the breach and never really got it back, panting and gasping and slamming himself against Danny’s cock and into Danny’s hand until he came, crying out Danny’s name in pleasured abandonment. That was enough for Danny, who knew love making when he was in it, and he powered into Nicholas, close to tears himself, finally getting what he always wanted and what he somehow knew was always his.

####
 
 
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
 
 
 
zombie survivalistbeccavox on November 14th, 2007 11:40 pm (UTC)
Okay...I'm going for a walk. Then I'm coming back and reading both parts again. Maybe I won't cry next time.

Whew....
mikes_grrl on November 15th, 2007 02:34 am (UTC)
Cry? I didn't think it was *that* angsty...I kind of feel guilty about that. I mean, they are TOGETHER again! Isn't that great?

I hope? Awww...
zombie survivalistbeccavox on November 15th, 2007 03:41 am (UTC)
Yeah, they are together again, and I am very happy about that (since I'm such a NA/DB whore). I don't know that it was as angsty as shocking and then just lovely.

Plus, I'm slightly...er...massively...hormonal. So it wasn't a bad cry. Just one of those that you need once in awhile to set the world right.

But Danny's slap did shock the hell out of me. Didn't see it coming...
lacking in glitter: subtexttawg on November 15th, 2007 04:04 am (UTC)
See, I want to say that it's a really sweet ending, because they're back together and not quite as messed up as usual. But somehow I have trouble seeing Danny laying down the law as 'sweet'. Although, the phrase 'well it's about damn time' did enter my head.